Too Damn High: Ohio Man Calls Cops on Himself

Demonstrating that smoking today’s potent marijuana strains is not for the weak minded, police in an Ohio Township were called to a residence by a young man who protested he’d gotten way too high smoking some Ohio chronic.

According to a report in The Youngstown Vindicator, cops in the tiny Township of Austintown found the 22-year-old newbie stoner collapsed “on the floor in the fetal position” and “was surrounded by a plethora of Doritos, Pepperidge Farm Goldfish and Chips Ahoy cookies.”

Dazed and confused, the Vindy also noted in its report that the man told officers he couldn’t feel his hands.

After handing over the keys to his ride, police found a glass Mason jar stuffed with marijuana, rolling papers, two roaches, and assorted paraphernalia in the man’s car.

After declining medical treatment for his perceived condition (being too high), the police have yet to charge the man with a crime.

Lil Dicky feels his pain…

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